What we think...

A jargon test for you…

23rd November 2009
6:24pm

Posted by Alison Esse

Filed under Elsewhere, Stories

Thanks to Helen Love at Intuitive Brands for this little gem.  As I pursue my quest to de-jargonise business communications, please feel free to have a go…

“A research team proceeded towards the apex of a natural geological protuberance, the purpose of their expedition being the procurement of a sample of fluid hydride of oxygen in a large vessel, the exact size of which was unspecified.  One member of the team precipitately descended sustaining severe fractural damage to the upper cranial portion of his anatomical structure.  Subsequently, the second member of the team performed a self-rotational translation oriented in the direction taken by the first team member.”

Now, answer the following questions:

How many people in the team?

What were their names?

Comments

  1. great – such a good way to show how business speak can muddle stuff up!

    I’ve a feeling I’m going to be using this soon…

  2. This is going to sound stupid…

    So, what are the answers?
    Or are there any?

  3. Not stupid at all. There are answers to both questions – I’ll post them in a couple of days just in case I spoil anyone’s fun!

  4. Can hardly wait.
    nice post!

  5. OK, the answer is….

    Two people in the team, and their names are Jack and Jill.

  6. Two people and their names are Jack and Jill I reckon.
    Had to read it twice tho and am a mum.

  7. Grr just posted too late, but I did get it.. honest!

  8. Hmmm…
    So how were these answers obtained?

  9. C’mon, no one writes like this. Surely this an invented piece of turgid prose to make the case for simple writing through an exaggerated example?

  10. You are absolutely right – it was created for that very reason. I’ve seen some horrendous examples of writing with far too much jargon and corporate-speak which is a real turn-off. Just making the point that simple writing is far more engaging! Thanks for your comment.

  11. Yes, simple writing is far more engaging. Still, how were those answers gotten? Random? Might use this post in my blog sometime.
    Nice one!

  12. OK, for those unfamiliar with certain popular children’s rhymes in the UK, here it is:

    ‘Jack and Jill went up the hill
    to fetch a pail of water
    Jack fell down
    and broke his crown
    and Jill came tumbling after….’

  13. Aaah, makes sense now!
    Very cool, may borrow this someday.

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